["We". It's been just him and Marco for the longest time, he almost forgets he's always had 1600 brothers ready to back him up without a moment's notice. It brings him so much joy to hear all of these words, why can't he believe them? Why is it so hard to accept that something isn't his fault? He really can't stand himself sometimes. Rather than hugging back, Ace rested himself against Marco, shaking his head yet again.]
No. I don't blame you guys for anything. I couldn't if I tried, you guys haven't done anything to be blamed for. You guys have done nothing but help me, been a family for me. I'm sorry, it's just...
[It's hard. It always has been for him. No matter what, life has been a struggle for him. If he has a moment of happiness it's taken away. He lost Sabot to the world. He lost Thatch to Blackbeard. And he lost himself to Akainu. And even now, here in Luceti, everything could be taken away from him in a split second. No warning, no fight, not a thing. After the Malnosso get tired of him, he'll disappear from Luceti, and there's not a damn thing he can do to try and prevent it. It's just like being on the execution stand. He can die, and won't even have had a chance to fight back.
Why can't he ever fight back for his happiness?] This is something that's hard for me to move on from. I've been trying my hardest to tell myself that my life here matters, and not to let Marineford consume me. That's... moving on has been a lot harder than I thought it would. I'm trying to fight with all the horrible memories, and it's difficult.
[Fighting something has always been a challenge for him, hasn't it? Has he ever once won something...] Some days... I can't even help thinking about it for god knows how long. And everything that happened to you guys. I was stuck up there, telling all of you to get the fuck out, not to fight for me, but you did anyway. I didn't think I was worth it. And every time someone shouted "we're coming for you, Ace", I thought that it was because of me you were getting hurt and dying. When people shout that your the reason they're fighting, you can't help but think it's your fault they're getting hurt, too. [He leans a little more on Marco, trying to look for friendly support in this.]
It's been a challenge ever since I got back to try and move on from all of that.
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No. I don't blame you guys for anything. I couldn't if I tried, you guys haven't done anything to be blamed for. You guys have done nothing but help me, been a family for me. I'm sorry, it's just...
[It's hard. It always has been for him. No matter what, life has been a struggle for him. If he has a moment of happiness it's taken away. He lost Sabot to the world. He lost Thatch to Blackbeard. And he lost himself to Akainu. And even now, here in Luceti, everything could be taken away from him in a split second. No warning, no fight, not a thing. After the Malnosso get tired of him, he'll disappear from Luceti, and there's not a damn thing he can do to try and prevent it. It's just like being on the execution stand. He can die, and won't even have had a chance to fight back.
Why can't he ever fight back for his happiness?] This is something that's hard for me to move on from. I've been trying my hardest to tell myself that my life here matters, and not to let Marineford consume me. That's... moving on has been a lot harder than I thought it would. I'm trying to fight with all the horrible memories, and it's difficult.
[Fighting something has always been a challenge for him, hasn't it? Has he ever once won something...] Some days... I can't even help thinking about it for god knows how long. And everything that happened to you guys. I was stuck up there, telling all of you to get the fuck out, not to fight for me, but you did anyway. I didn't think I was worth it. And every time someone shouted "we're coming for you, Ace", I thought that it was because of me you were getting hurt and dying. When people shout that your the reason they're fighting, you can't help but think it's your fault they're getting hurt, too. [He leans a little more on Marco, trying to look for friendly support in this.]
It's been a challenge ever since I got back to try and move on from all of that.