[O-oh. Okay. That one right there? That might make him coo a little. God help him, NO ONE ELSE EVER is allowed to see this. They are all banned.]

So a duck walks into a bar, and he says, "You got any grapes?" [There's a bit of a Daffy Duck accent to this because that is how the joke goes.]
At first the bartender is astounded at meeting a talking duck and having him show up but he soon replies, "I'm sorry no, this is a bar, we only serve alcohol here."
So out the duck waddles. The next day he returns again and asks, "You got any grapes?"
The bartender is a little more confused by this. "What? You again? No. I told you yesterday, we only serve alcohol."

[Give Marco a moment for a small pause as he melts into a blue phoenix puddle. Man staying composed and thinking like this is hard.]

The duck waddles out again. Next morning though, same thing. "You got any grapes?"
"No," the bartender says, "We never gave grapes. This is a bar. The only grapes we have are wine and ducks can't drink that."
Well, this continues for awhile, and the bartender gets more and more frustrated. He throws a bottle at him eventually losing his patience and says for the duck to never come back, but still he returns. Day after day, "You got any grapes?"
Finally the bartender's had enough. He tells the duck, "If you come back in here again looking for grapes I'm going to take a hammer and nail your feet to the wall and make you hang there."
The next morning the duck comes back. The bartender scowls, about to resign himself to fate when the duck asks "You got any nails?"
"No, of course not, it's a bar, all we have is alcohol," he says like he's said a million times.
"Oh good," the duck beams. "You got any grapes?"