Ace and Sabo are gone // Written, Action

[fierybluebird]

[The first few times Marco tries to find his voice, he can't. This is what Robin, what everyone tried to warn him about isn't it? And he didn't listen. He always refused. Even if his father had been here and told him the same things, he wouldn't have listened to him either. At first he tries to seek solace in the rooftop, the memorial for his Pops, but today, not even that is enough. Where can he go other than "home?" And home is no longer CH3. It is still Luceti, scattered throughout his loved ones, but other than Leanne, that describe CH3 now.]

[He opens the journal and tries to speak, but he can't. So he winds up writing instead.]

Happy Post-Valentine's Day to anyone. I hope many happy couples found each other and no one was too disrupted.

[His hand shakes, and then clenches and the pen breaks. Too angry, so much rage. He uses the bottom half of the quill as best as he can to write more.]

My little brothers, [A long pause. He looks up at the flag and... it's not enough. Nothing is.] are both gone. Even knowing that every single day they had here was extra time, and as grateful as I am for that, they deserve more. I can't tell you they've gone to a better place, because they haven't.

[The last thing Sabo saw before his death was fire. And Ace died crying and smiling at the same time.]

But they're in good company I guess.

[Good company? He was jealous of them, still, even now. He had a huge fight with Ace about it, but he was jealous. Ace was jealous that Marco could be with the living, and Marco was jealous that Ace could be with the dead, could protect someone he loved that deeply by dying for them, something Marco never could. It was a dumb thing to be jealous about, but even knowing how infantile it was, didn't make it go away. It's a good time to go get a new pen. So Marco jumps down and goes to the item shop, finds a pen and right there, in middle of the shop, sits down on the floor and continues.]

I've lost a lot of nakama before, but Ace's affected me the worst. He brought with him a new era. He saved the man who will be the New Pirate King and renounced the world's idea of villains and heroes. [Marco sets the book and pen down so he won't break them again and it's all bit before he picks them back up.] In legends, phoenixes are supposed to herald the changing of eras, but I hate it. Mankind's eras in my world are tragically majestic things, but what use are they to an individual?

I'm not going back to the apartment for a long time. And I might move when I'm ready. I took the important things with me, but I'm not going back there.

Luceti is still my home. Make no mistake, I'll fight forever for my right to stay and the right for anyone else who wants to stay. I always will. That's who I am.

[He needs to talk to people, to try to comfort them in the wake of Ace's absence, in the wake of Sabo's, but all Marco wants to do is fly away. It's too cowardly though, so he won't. He wants to switch into phoenix form and stop feeling anything, but that's also cowardly and he know Robin's been trying to break him of the habit.]

If you think you can find me, you can try, otherwise, say the word and I'll come find you. No promises about the state I'll be in.

- Marco

Comments

[Written]

[faithfulflame]

[Rei...knows that feeling. She remembers what it was like losing Usagi. And what it was like losing Harry. And...she knows that he needs someone.

Prayer is in order. And she's already getting out paper.]

Marco-san, come to the shrine, please.

[Action]

[fierybluebird]

[He doesn't reply, just goes. He takes a deep breath outside... and goes in.]

Sorry.

For Mr. Dresden. [He's not normally so formal, but he didn't say anything back when it happened. Between everything with Robin, and trying to manage everything else, he wanted to give it time... and then it was too late. Which was always how it went around here. Fuck.]

[faithfulflame]

[Rei doesn't say a word, she just stands up and throws her arms around Marco. She's not normally one for displays of affection like that. But...after Valentine's day, and Harry, and...she knows what Ace meant to Marco. And Sabo too. Losing family. Family that...couldn't come back. That was just...it was awful.

And even if it wasn't what she'd normally do, she knew he needed that.]

[fierybluebird]

[He can't help it, he hugs her back but soon switches into his phoenix form to keep from sobbing uncontrollably.]

[He knows, he knows that every day extra was a day extra, but he can't help but feeling like he failed Ace all over again, like he failed Sabo. Was this the Malnosso teaching him a lesson, or just coincidence? Did it even matter?]

I didn't even get to say goodbye.

[faithfulflame]

Oh...Marco-san. I...I'm sorry.

[She pulls back when he switches, a little surprised with herself for doing it in the first place. It wasn't really proper. But...Marco had been good to her, better than most people, and he did need the support. It's what Usagi would do. And all the others. She tugged him gently though, pulling him towards the fire.]

Sit. You...may want hands. We'll send Ace-san and Sabo-kun away with prayer.

1/2

[fierybluebird]

[He doesn't switch back immediately, he doesn't trust himself with human emotions on his face.]

I'm not really a prayer kind of guy though... not normally.

2/2

[fierybluebird]

[Just looks into the fire. But the charms had worked. And Marco believed in Rei, if not spirituality. So he slowly switches back to human with his legs folded.] I don't know what to tell them either.

[faithfulflame]

You tell them you love them.

[And knowing they were dead?]

And that you'll remember them, always.

[fierybluebird]

Okay. I think I can do that. Should I write it down?

[faithfulflame]

[Slides over a brush, inkstone, and paper]

You should.

[She prepares the same]

And I'll do it too.

[fierybluebird]

Okay. [Get the brush going with the ink and then glances up at her.] One for Pops too, because they're all together.

I hope.

[faithfulflame]

[Rei nods, to all of that.]

Of course, Marco-san.

[fierybluebird]

Thank you, Rei.

I've written him letters before. And put them in the bottles around his memorial. So I guess it's like that, eh?

[Closes his eyes and does his best to write through the wetness clouding them over.]

[faithfulflame]

Something like that, yes.

[Rei writes letters as well, to all three. Just wishing them farewell, safe journey into the hereafter, and for bringing up a good person like Marco.

She'll wait for him to finish, since his are probably much longer than hers.]

[fierybluebird]

[It does indeed take him awhile but as he finishes up, he gulps and folds the letters before passing them over.]

[faithfulflame]

[Rei hands them back.]

Do you remember how to do these prayers?

[fierybluebird]

A little. I'm afraid I need to be walked through it again though, everything's a little hazy right now. Kind of just trying not to turn into a phoenix and escape, really.

[That he's even being this honest is a good indication of how frayed he is at this point.]

[faithfulflame]

Very well. Do as I do.

[Rei takes her own letters, stands up, and looks at the flames. Clapping three times, she bows and tosses them into the fire before clapping twice more, bowing, and taking a seat again.]

[fierybluebird]

[Nods and follows after her, clapping, bowing, putting them in the fire, clapping and bowing again before taking his seat. And then glances at her for a cue.]

[faithfulflame]

[Instead of talking, Rei just starts pouring tea.]

[fierybluebird]

[Yaaaay tea. Tea is always the best solution for this sort of thing really.]

[faithfulflame]

[Rei also sets out a plate of senbei and dango]

Do you want to talk about it?

[fierybluebird]

I don't know what to say.

I want to say all I have left now is revenge, but he wanted me to carry on what I want, and maybe some of the things he would have done. And part of me figures to hell with what he wants, he left, he doesn't get to have a say anymore.

Which intellectually, I realize is petty and selfish and solves less than nothing.

[faithfulflame]

I think you should do what you can to honor him and his memory.

[Sips tea]

[fierybluebird]

Aye, I will. Pops too. It's just figuring out how to best do that, eh?